From single parent

Family of Three

I took the kids camping for a few days this week. It was a gorgeous spot situated right on a lake, complete with beachy-mud-sand. We had the place to ourselves and the weather could not have been better. Endless blue skies, big juicy clouds, and afternoon storms that would rage their way through our camp…

The Guilt of Divorce.

Two days ago I told my ex that I wished our children had never been born. And in that moment, I meant it. Let me be very clear – I LOVE MY CHILDREN. They are amazing; kind, smart, loving, and a pain in the ass when they want to be. I grew them for fuck’s…

Age. Apparently, It’s a Thing.

I am finally acknowledging something that hurts to admit. My age is starting to bug me. It is becoming a ‘thing’ my mind keeps coming back to. And per usual, I need to pay some attention to these thoughts; to process through them and make sense of the acute physical distress they are currently causing…

The Secret Inner Drive

There is a disconnect within my mind; thoughts buried so deep, they tug at my subconscious. I am trying very hard to acknowledge them though they feel primal and hard to access. I want to pay more attention to my very busy inner mind; the driving force behind some of my behavior. I want to separate my rich inner…

Straight up RANT.

I had to go into hiding; lockdown. I have been faced with yet another monstrous hurdle in this shit-show called divorce. The ex wants my kids (aged 9 and 7) to live in a home with multiple people; one of whom I do not know. Adults. His girlfriend is one of them and another male…

A reality I do not want to face

I hate to have to do this. I don’t want to talk about it, write about it, complain about it…But fuck, I am freaking out about money. The stark reality of having one income instead of two is currently unnerving me. With a legal separation and with a divorce, come separate finances. Separate incomes, bills,…

The curious paradox

I am not sure who I am sometimes. Take away my marriage, my primary relationship of the past 16 years, and I am lost. Take away my family, my role as a mother; change it from full-time to part-time, and I am lost. I had a vision not too long ago; wide awake and crystal clear.…

Why the mom-guilt should fuck right off

This day has been about the the hard stuff. The single parent bullshit stuff I don’t want to deal with. I woke up sick and exhausted. I’ve got my kids for the next 3 days; which, don’t get me wrong, I am simply thrilled about. However, being this run down is making me feel like a shitty…