A Gentle Sadness

*First of all, I would like to apologize to my readers for having been gone so long. It wasn’t my intention; I have been healing and processing so much, I didn’t have the energy to write.*   I have come to accept that there is an undercurrent of sadness that gently flows beneath everything that…

You Are Not Invisible

The New Year can be tough for many people for many different reasons. For those of us that suffer from mental illness, we fight a battle every single day of the year. The New Year doesn’t feel any different because we carry our wounds with us no matter what day of the year it is.…

Loving Without Expectation

I have been reading loads of articles on letting go of expectations in regards to relationships. And I have come to the conclusion that I am not capable of this. Yet. Logically, I believe in everything I have read. Letting go of the need to box up a relationship and give it a name. Letting…

Beauty in Breakdown

I am giving you permission to fall apart. To crumble and drop to your knees. To cry so hard you can’t catch your breath and your whole body trembles. I want you to know that it is okay to break and feel like you are losing your mind. It is okay to feel hopeless. To…

I am So Sorry

Sometimes I feel like you left because you were bored and restless. I feel like you left because you were unsatisfied with our marriage, our family, and your place within the life you and I had created together. I don’t think you wanted the responsibility of having a family or a mortgage. I believe that…

Resilience

I am in love with this word. The sheer power in evokes for me internally is enough right there. But it is so much more than that. It is strength, fierceness, power, fighting back, never giving up, never surrendering. It means that when life throws you a curve ball, you catch the damn thing and…

Birthday Thoughts

Today is my 43rd birthday. One year ago today, I wrote my first blog post. I was so distraught and so completely rocked with grief and emotion, my head and heart felt like they were exploding. I was working through SO MUCH and I needed an outlet. So, I bought a laptop, and I started…

Chrysalis Soup

From National Geographic: But what goes on inside a pupa? We know that a larva releases enzymes that break down many of its tissues into their constituent proteins. Textbooks will commonly talk about the insect dissolving into a kind of “soup”, but that’s not entirely accurate. Some organs stay intact. Others, like muscles, break down into…

What love is and is not.

Love isn’t careful planning. Love isn’t compartmentalized. Love isn’t to be boxed up and put aside on a shelf to collect dust. Love isn’t to be left alone in the dark corners of your heart. Love is to be held in the palm of your hand and marveled at. Love is to be shared and…