Tagged polyamory

Loving Without Expectation

I have been reading loads of articles on letting go of expectations in regards to relationships. And I have come to the conclusion that I am not capable of this. Yet. Logically, I believe in everything I have read. Letting go of the need to box up a relationship and give it a name. Letting…

Compersion and NRE a blissful combination or a recipe for disaster?

Compersion. NRE. Two of the most popular terms thrown around in poly circles. Compersion is defined as “the positive feelings one gets when a lover is enjoying another relationship”. Jealousy be damned, if you are polyamorous, compersion is the mecca of feelings. If you are successful in feeling compersion, then Welcome, Friends! You are officially amazing at…

It’s Thanksgiving and I want to talk about sex.

Yes, it is Thanksgiving, and yes, I want to talk about sex. I love sex! I am thankful for sex. And hormones, libido, and all of the crazy and not so crazy physical stuff that makes us beautifully and vulnerably human. I was raised Roman Catholic; I grew up in a household that did not discuss…

In Defense of Polyamory

I would like to make something very clear. Polyamory was not the direct cause of the dissolution of my marriage. It was an indirect cause. It ignited a fire in a relationship that was already fractured (mixed metaphors, I know). You can count on poly to be a lot of hard work, emotional upheaval, and,…

Polyamory 101 and how we fucked it up

There were so many fucking times my husband and I should have stopped our failed attempt at polyamory. We had actual conversations and examined it from every angle. Should we stop? Is this hurting us or making us stronger? What if this breaks us? What about the kids? We seriously had these conversations and always…

How polyamory cracked me wide open

Polyamory. Heard of it? It is a lifestyle choice. It is the belief that ethical non-monogamy is a more natural way of love and life for some (not all) people. It rests on the belief that no one person can meet all of your needs. No one relationship can fulfill you; that monogamy is not a…